Immigration guy: How long are you staying in the UK?
(He was a little gruff. Quite understandable when you consider it was 5:45am).
Me: Less than a month.
Imm Guy: What for?
Me: Holiday.
Pause while he scans the rest of the card.
Imm Guy: Where are you staying while in the UK?
He is clearly not impressed at me supplying only a suburb in the 'address' column.
Me: Well, I don't know the address of the place. I'm staying with friends.
Imm Guy: I need an address for where you'll be staying.
Me: I don't have the address on me.
Imm Guy: Well, I need an address for where you'll be staying.
Me: I don't know the address, and I can't find it until I get through.
Imm Guy: Carshalton Gardens? Where is this place?
Me: It's a suburb.* It's where I'm staying, I just don't know the street address.
Imm Guy: I need more than a suburb.
Me: I don't know anymore than that.
Imm Guy: And you're travelling alone?
Finally he waved me through, I'm assuming on the grounds that I looked harmless and was wasting his time. I could have told him that.
Anyway, this did not change the fact that I still did not have an address for Beryl and Alex's place, apart from a vague five year old memory of how to get there. Of course, 'lost' does not exist in my universe. There is only Slight Geographical Misplacement, and that is a different thing altogether. The fact that I was able to get myself to Paddington Station without great mishap is a thing to be celebrated. The fact that Paddington Station was not the station I was meant to get myself to is completely irrelevant.
*As it turns out, it is not. Instead, it is a figment of my imagination, as my poor tired brain had amalgamated Carshalton Beeches and Beddington Gardens at the shock of being interrogated. This may have been one of the factors compounding his irritance.
4 comments:
When you are at customs it is vitally important not to mention that you are travelling for a frisbee tournament. That seems to be the international code for 'strip search'. I also advise against trying to get into the states holding only a singing fish (Charles Blumer nearly did not make it) and finally when asked where are staying, "At your place?" is never the right answer to the burly customs type person. :-)
Thanks, I'll remember that. Unfortunately, you should have told me the bit about the singing fish before I tried to get into Tanzania...
Haha. I did actually have issues getting into Africa. Stupid visas. But that shall be a story for a later post.
trust you to be vague and 'misplaced' silly twit! :P
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